The news of the unwanted pregnancy has always being very devastating to the ear, mind and soul. The thought that you have placed a seed inside a girl when you are not yet ready, kills the spirit with a two sharp edged sword and leaves the outside with no harm. So many thoughts creep into your mind, you really don’t want to do something that you will regret in future.
So many premarital relationships finally end up with an unwanted pregnancy if the partners involved weren’t extremely careful while carrying out their sexual escapades. This may leave the female finally ending up with an unwanted pregnancy, her future and that of the unborn child can be marred or left dangling on top the apex of a cone, depending on the decision you make to determine whether it is going to fall back and be stable or fall into an everlasting pit of frustration.
So, imagine you got your girlfriend pregnant, her future and that of the unborn child is automatically left in your hands to decide. What will you do? You have three options to choose from:
- Are you going to deny, deny and deny again. Deny till the girl’s parents grow impatient and the police can’t find anything against you because you denied and won the case in the court. Or….
- Are you going to suggest to the girl to carry out an abortion, fund the abortion and get rid of the pregnancy? Or….
- Are you going to agree that you are the one responsible for the pregnancy, take care of the girl, love her the more, get her the things she need to take care of the pregnancy? When the baby comes you either give it up for the welfare or raise the baby together with your girlfriend.
The decision you make will surely determine the fate of your girlfriend and your unborn child. First of all let me introduce you to the outcome of each of the 3 available decisions you can make for yourself concerning the unwanted pregnancy.
Going for the first; that is to deny. You might get away with it, unharmed, your future intact and bobbling. But the future of the girl will be doomed if she is not strong enough to ply through the wavy and stormy obstacles that will be facing her. She might even end up losing her life, that of the baby and I bet you heaven and earth will not be happy with you, only hell will. If she eventually survives and jumps back to a normal and stable life, she will never forgive you unless you plead for forgiveness with the last drop of tears in your tears bag (if there is anything like that). If your child survives, he/she might hunt you down and kill you in your sleep; that is if you gave birth to a devil incarnate.
Going for the second option, you will be risking the life of the girl and increasing your probability to spend the better part of your life in jail. If the girl survives the abortion, she might have mutilated her womb which will affect her in future. The last implication is that….although its rare, but I have heard so many guys and ladies who have aborted ones or twice confess that they do hear the voice of children crying from the walls, even when the room they are inside is totally empty.
The last option is the most recommended, appreciated and the world will love you more later on. Although it will be very hard to make and carry out this decision, especially when you are still a student and depending on your pocket money to survive. Taking care and providing for your girlfriend will always be a very big, heart ladened decision but it will later make sense in the future. Your girlfriend will be grateful to you, even if her life will never go as she planned it again but your love and care is what she will presently need at that point in time. Her strength will increase and she will be able to ply through the through time with you. Your unborn child will be happy also, at least you didn’t make the first two decisions which would have made people call him/her bastard, or even flushed her down in the name of abortion. But it will be tough, really tough. Your family will not take it likely with you and you will turn into an object of mockery among the people around you.
If you have choosed the third option, you must have understood the pros and cons attached to it. But never mind, you will be making the best decision. A decision that its reward will keep following you even till after life. You need to understand the basics and follow a guide which will see you through and also bring the cons to minimal. Here is the guideline, and I am sure it will help you:
- After hearing the news, don’t freak out, calm down and try to calm your girlfriend down, she even needs it more than you do. There is no need freaking out, getting upset, trying to put the blame on each other, the deed has already being done, and the deed needs to be undone.
- When she is calm, bring her closer to you and hug her, make her know that the love you have for her is still intact, I bet you it will at least make her forget about the pregnancy for some seconds.
- Pull her to the corner gently, the both of you should try to come up with a decision. Is she willing to keep the pregnancy? If she is, how will her needs be provided? Should the both of your parents know about it now or later? How will the news be broken down to the parents?
- If the both of you are still staying and depending on your parents, I think letting the both parents know earlier will be the best option. The parents should be told with the both of you present.
- If you don’t have a paying job, maybe you are a student, you need to pick up a part time job so as to be able to provide the meager needs for your girlfriend and the unborn baby. You need to re-modify your time to suit, work, school and family times, none of these should lack attention.
- Don’t listen to what people have to say, in this part of the world, when such things happen, people has a way whereby they use their mouth to send the couples into their early grave. Don’t listen to what people will say, just know that you have made the best decision ever, you now have a family and that is all that matters.
- After the baby has being delivered, it is now left for you, your girlfriend to decide whether you want to keep the baby or give him/her up for the welfare. This decision always come up when you the girl is not ready to be a mother and leaving the baby in her care will just be risking his/her If you eventually agree to take care of the baby, you and your girlfriend will have to decide whether the baby will stay with you, her or will your family or her family take care of the baby.
- Finally, prepare to be a father and a husband to your girlfriend unless otherwise. Being a father is by far above making the baby laugh by playing with him/her.
When all this guides stated above are followed, I bet you, the pain, sorrows, agony, and destruction of a planned future accompanied by unwanted pregnancy will be minimized. You will see that, in the long run you have nothing to lose but just seeing your lovely baby and your girlfriend alive and happy because of your presence and because you refused to deny your girlfriend’s pregnancy and your child’s existence.
I just have 3 questions to ask and you will make my day by putting your answers down in the comment box immediately after reading.
- Imagine yourself In this condition and be sincere to yourself, what will you do?
- Will you tell your parents, or hide it from them till they get to know by themselves?
- Will you give your baby up to the welfare or take care of him/her?